There are
some ways by which you may know that you have offense in your heart towards
someone. Go through the following
statements, circling any statements that are true for you.
1.
You do not want to talk to this person or have
them hang around you so you keep your distance.
2.
Anger, hurt, bitterness or resentment rises up
inside of you towards this person.
3.
You complain to others about this person and
desire for others to agree with you about the hurt that they have caused.
4.
You blame this person for the hurt and pain that
you have.
5.
You have a strong emotional response when you
see this person unexpectantly.
6.
You struggle to sincerely pray for this person,
bless them and see them prosper and grow.
7.
You struggle being happy for them when good
things happen in their life.
8.
You wish that they would pay for what they have
done to you.
9.
You sometimes find yourself dreaming of ways you
can get even with them.
10.
You make up speeches in your head about what you
should/could have said to them.
11.
You think,
“I’ve forgiven them, but I don’t have to like them.”
12.
You bring up past hurts, which are still fresh
in the mind, no matter how long ago they happened.
13.
You talk about this person behind their back,
for example, “Don’t tell her I said this, but…”
14.
You tell the same story again and again.
15.
You struggle engaging in appropriate physical
touch with this person.
16.
You desire to write them off, to eliminate them
from your life.
17.
You find it easy not to care about what happens
to them.
18.
You blame God, for example, “Why did God allow
this to happen?”
19.
You generally don’t want spiritual guidance on
what to do about the situation.
20.
Your “acts of love” towards this person are
phoney, a play act, and in some cases a total fraud.
21.
You find yourself struggling with the hurt
instead of experiencing peace from God.
22.
You find that your love for this person is
growing cold or has gone cold (you have less and less love for them).
23.
You find that you are lacking the fruit of the
spirit in your life – love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness,
faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control.
24.
You find that you want to give up, quit, leave
spouse/family/church/job, etc.
Offense Prayer Sheet
Luke 23:34 (ESV) “Father, forgive them, for they
know not what they do.”
Meditation: When Jesus
was hanging on the cross, He did not wait for the people to ask for
forgiveness, or even for them to recognize that what they were doing was wrong.
He just forgave. True love forgets wrongs and forgives, with no strings
attached, with no grudges and with no expectations of receiving love in return.
That’s how God loves us! His love for us
isn’t dependent on what we do for Him, or how we treat Him, or whether we love
Him back. His love is perfect. Write a prayer to Jesus thanking Him for His
perfect love for you and for the many times that He has forgiven you.
Reflection: Who is a person in your life whom you currently
hold offense against?
Reflection: Are you
ready to take responsibility for your feelings (hurt)? If so, tell God about
this, writing a prayer that takes ownership of your feelings. If not, ask Jesus to show you why you are
unable to own your feelings.
Reflection: Forgiveness is a choice; it’s not a one-time
decision but rather a process of choosing to forgive every day. Are you ready to take the next step in the
process of forgiving this person? If so,
write a prayer telling Jesus that you forgive this person and asking Him to
cleanse you of your hurt feelings. If
not, ask Jesus to give you strength to forgive and to do a work of grace in
your heart.
Thanksgiving: Thank Jesus for what He has shown you this
morning. Ask Him to give you a word,
thought or picture of how He is working in your life to bring wholeness and to
grow in you love.
Note: If you feel stuck, please talk to your group leader about
booking a personal ministry appointment and consider going to the next Set
Free! Retreat.
